You can’t hit a home run without rounding first base. Or at least I never have. Hell, I don’t even think Derek Jeter has. And call me old-fashioned, but I wouldn’t want to, despite Chloe Anderson’s assertion on Modern Man that women assign a much higher value to kissing prowess than their male counterparts.
Don’t sell us short, Ms. Anderson. We too enjoy a good hard kiss in the rain, or with our backs pressed against a barfront wall, or naked and shivering in post-coital clench. While women may be more sensitive than us in some areas, the lips are not one of them.
Underestimations of our fondness for the lip-lock aside, Anderson goes on to present a comprehensive how-to guide on the five kisses every guy should master. I would go a step further and de-gender-alize things: let’s call them the five kisses everyone should master.
1) The First Kiss
Chloe says: “Brush your lips softly against hers before you start with any serious tongue action.”
I say: Touch his/her face (lightly). Doubling down on physical contact will intensify sensations for both of you.
2) The Public Kiss
Chloe says: “Don’t go overboard; public kisses should be … G-rated.”
I say: You can occasionally surpass G-rated—just make it brief. A stolen kiss in a dimly-lit bar that involves some darting tongue and perhaps a lingering nibble of the lip on the pull-away is a great way to hint at greater things to come later on.
3) The “I Want You” Kiss
Chloe says: “Push her up against a wall, run your hands through her hair, and press your tongue into hers with purpose.”
I say: The onus always seems to be on the guy to make this kind of aggressive play. I cannot impress enough on you how hot it is when a girl flips the gender script and takes control from time to time.
4) The Sex Kiss
Chloe says: “I recommend softly pressing your lips up against her the moment you enter her, and then backing off for a minute or so while you two find your groove before kissing her again.”
I say: Try the phantom kissing game. What the heck does that mean? Open your mouth and hover in as if you are going to lay one on him/her. At the last second, pull back, leaving contrails of dewy breath behind to suggest the kiss that almost was. Hopefully your partner will take a cue and do the same. It becomes a game of chicken. Continue the charade till someone gets too worked up and simply has to kiss the other. This is great during pre-coital makeouts, too, but it’s especially awesome mid-deed.
5) The 10,000th Kiss
Chloe says: “I am personally a fan of an old-fashoned makeout session that only goes about as far as second base.”
I say: I mean, we’re not going to object if it perhaps goes to third, rounds third, sets its sights on home, lowers its shoulders for a play at the plate … Wait, we are still talking about the baseball game that’s on in the background, right?
—Written by Walker James Loetscher for HowAboutWe.com
Whose kissing opinion do you agree with? What are your best kissing tips?
More from HowAboutWe:
50 Places to Make Out Before You Die
30 Hot Pictures of People Kissing—Because Why Not?
Public Displays of Affection: 7 Common Sense Guidelines