Reset Your Sex Clock for a Hotter Love Life

No matter how red-hot your sex life is in the beginning of a relationship, it’s bound to taper off at some point (unless, of course, you two happen to be the luckiest couple on the entire planet). Everyone falls into sexual ruts, so what makes the difference is what you do once you get there. If you’re ready to get inventive and perhaps venture out of your comfort zone, try waking up in the middle of the night and surprising your guy with some sex. Afternoon delight? Psh. It just got upgraded.

Trust me when I tell you sleep is one of my favorite things in the world. Even the concept of it delights me. All this is to say I don’t make this recommendation lightly, because you might be wondering, Is Zahra absolutely insane? No. What’s insane is how good sex can be when you have it in the middle of the night. And once you do it, you’ll see why I recommend trying it as a way to infuse some excitement into your sex life.

Part of what makes sex so incredible at the start of a relationship is the unpredictability. One moment, you’ll be at a friend’s housewarming party snacking on hors d’oeuvres. The next, your guy has pulled you into the bathroom for some silent sex because you just couldn’t wait until you got home. Or maybe your first time traveling together involved pulling the car over onto an abandoned road so you could test your flexibility in the cramped car space. Putting the moves on your guy in the middle of the night capitalizes on the fact that, to put it simply, spontaneity is hot. Plus, since you’ll be half asleep for most of it, the sex will have this dreamy quality that’s hard to match when you’re fully awake.

There are a couple of things to address, namely, how to actually wake up and how far you should take the action before your guy is fully aware of what’s going on. If you’re like me and wake up tons of times throughout the night, that makes it easy. Just fight the (incredibly, almost bafflingly strong) urge to go back to sleep. If you’re the type who is out like a rock for hours as soon as you close your eyes, make the most of one of the few things that can rouse almost anyone: an “I’ve gotta pee” urge. Who hasn’t been woken up by a full bladder? After you hit the bathroom, you can get the action going. (Yet another reason to stay extra-hydrated!) If even that won’t work, there’s no shame in setting a sex alarm, then silencing it ASAP so you retain the element of surprise. Do what you’ve gotta do!

As for how many bases you should round before your guy wakes up, that depends on your relationship. If you know your guy has always had the fantasy of being woken up with a blow job, go for it. If you have no idea how he feels about it, stay on the safe side and do a lot of kissing and thigh rubbing until he comes to. Although spontaneity makes sex excellent, consent trumps all.

Have you ever had sex in the middle of the night?